Sunday, November 16, 2014

Bad Practice Bingo

A while back, I made a bout bingo for the fans, and as the season comes to a close, I decided to revamp the Bingo card for a bad practice bingo. Of course I elicited help from all of Facebookdom, and the floodgates opened! Trust me, all leagues have the same problems which can sabotage a practice. One of these actions can happen and have very little impact on practice, but three or four of these issues come up, and suddenly your league is having a bad derby practice.

Other options for the squares (just in case you wanted to make your own Bad Practice Bingo)

1. "I don't have to <blank>. I'm a jammer." or "I don't have to do <blank>. I'm a blocker."
2. "I don't want to skate with the FM scrimmagers. They're too inexperienced and I can't handle that. (or) They're too inexperienced and I'll get hurt."
3. First practice back after injury or extended (several month) LOA: "What do you mean I can't scrimmage tonight?!" 
4.  Gear is still damp from the last practice, because you foolishly forgot to take it out of your bag.
5.  Married/involved skaters or skater/coach get into a relationship fight, make practice awkward and uncomfortable for everyone else.
6. Skater looks like they're dying during endurance, smokes cigarettes during "quick" water breaks.
7. "That's not how <insert high ranking WFTDA league name> does it"  
8. Skater doesn't pay attention to the directions of the drill and then gets frustrated when they try the drill. 
9. Drills planned for practice, skaters who most need to work on said skills don't show. 
10.  Women's roller derby promotes feminism, individuality, community, and empowerment... everyone in the league is too intimidated to stand up to bullies/bullying behavior.
11. too sick for practice - posts photos out drinking at the bar 

Thank you everyone for your contributions!


  1. I don't know why, but the one about "get in 2 lines" cracked me up the most. You think that's bad, try 4 lines!

    1. So true, our league is notoriously bad at forming lines

  2. Bless you. Bless you very hard :)
    (love the idea of game bingo, don't think I'll be playing bad practice bingo any time soon - too easy to 'win' sometimes....)

  3. Everyone has PMS is fucking killing me.

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  5. I coach a Junior team in Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan, Canada and your hilarious Practice Bingo was brought to my attention with the following comment;

    "I read these, and could only picture your face.... doing that look where you're trying to hide that look"

    Thanks for the laugh!