Coaching Styles

I was lucky enough to play in the Got to Be NC Tournament this weekend, and I got to experience a lot of new things.  I played in three games against three hard hitting teams, I was able to announce the men's bout and I had my pants yanked down in front of everyone and their brother.  Awesome.  Thank goodness I wear full coverage panties when I play in games!  Whew!  In spite of all of the distractions and fun, and wardrobe malfunctions, I observed something as all four teams played in the tournament; even though every coach is a unique individual, their coaching style can be broken down into common categories.  The Screamer, The Cool Head, The Erupter, and The Usher.

The Screamer
Seems like many men who coach women's roller derby do a lot of yelling.  This might be because roller girls often have the attention span of a cracked out squirrel.  OH SHINY!  I personally do not like The Screamer type of coach because if he's always screaming over every little thing while I'm on the track, I have no idea what I should be marking as "urgent".  Is he yelling because he's just yelling?  Or is he yelling because the opposing jammer is standing up in the box and we need to be aware of our next move?  Is he yelling because his underwear is too tight?  Who knows?  Ever have that annoying neighbor with the car alarm that always goes off?  Screamer coaches are like that to me.  They become background noise, which I eventually ignore.  Maybe they feel so passionate about the sport that they end up yelling and screaming about everything on the derby track, but after an hour of that kind of coaching, I would cease to care if he was passionate or not.  I wonder if refs take The Screamer seriously when they have an issue.  I'm sure referees would never say, but I would think they wouldn't.  JUST MY OPINION.

The Cool Head
I'm having a unique experience this year because our league has a Cool Head coach; he doesn't scream and yell or lose his crap while coaching, but he is intense.  The interesting thing about having an intense coach like that is the fact that he can say something and you feel like he's put a lot of thought into it, no matter if he has or hasn't.  Of course I give my coach the benefit of the doubt, but maybe not all Cool Heads are as thoughtful, but their presentation is awesome.  I'm sure some derby players think that the Cool Head doesn't have the passion that The Screamer has, but I would rather have less chaos on my bench.

The Eruptor
A lot of people confuse The Eruptor with The Screamer, but they're completely different personality types.  The Screamer is a constant barrage of noise, while The Eruptor might present as a Cool Head before he or she erupts into a seething frenzy of yelling or throwing things.  It must be terrifying to have an Eruptor as a coach; people must live in fear of a volcanic eruption at any moment. I often wonder if the players that have an Eruptor as a coach are always flinching!  What a terrible stress to have at a game.

Picture found here

The Usher
The Usher is a ninja bench coach who does line ups and keeps the bench quiet and under control.  The Usher keeps the bench calm and quiet, keeps an eye on who is in the box, and makes rational choices about lineups.  If an Usher coach has done her job well, you won't even notice all of the last minute decisions she had to make.  All hail the Ninja Usher Bench Coach!

There's Not Always Room for Jell-O Wrestling

I will admit that I joined roller derby in a golden year; it was 2009, and derby was already crawling out of its muck of its origins.  The wheel of punishments was long gone, fishnets were starting to be outnumbered by compression pants, and the game was starting to reward athletic skaters as opposed to barroom brawlers.  It was a great time to start derby. 

Unfortunately, I've been noticing a scary trend lately on Facebook posts from other leagues.  People are bringing back Jell-O wrestling or spaghetti wrestling or baby oil wrestling for league fund raisers.  I've been thinking about this trend for a while, and I absolutely hate it.  HATE IT!   So what, Q?  Who cares what other leagues do to raise money?  Well, I do, and here's why.

For eating, not wrestling.

First of all, I know that we are all hurting for money for our leagues.  With the WFTDA changing the the procedure for rankings, leagues are traveling further and further to play the games they need.  Sometimes this means that a team has to travel far away for up to two to three times a year just to get a sanctioned game that will count for rankings.  That also means that sometimes leagues are packing two or three games into a travel weekend, which means they might have to extend their stay in a city, which also costs megabucks.  Couple that with many leagues seeing a drop in attendance at games, and you have an overwhelming need for money that can drive even the most respectable league to consider selling their respect in order to earn money.

Yes, I said it.  When your league succumbs to doing something like Jell-O wrestling to earn cash, you are trading in on everything you're striving to accomplish in roller derby.  Why are you traveling that far to play those games in the first place?  Is it because you feel like you are an athlete and want to be respected as such?  How do you reconcile rolling around in Jell-O with another skater, usually scantily clad, with being a respected athlete?  If you belong to the WFTDA, you know their catch phrase is "Real. Strong. Athletic. Revolutionary."  Do you think any of these words describe Jell-O wrestling?  Do you think the spectators who come to watch derby girls roll around in food products think "wow, that's a real athlete in there" or do you think they're there to hopefully see someone pop out of her top? Jell-O wrestling is spectacle, and it puts our sport right back to the level it was in 2004. 

Have you thought about what your sponsors think about Jell-O wrestling?  Leagues live and die by their sponsors, and if you have one that is very family oriented, then they may not want to reup their sponsorship next season.  You might be shooting yourself in the foot in the long run to rake in short term cash.  That's not necessarily a great financial plan.

But, Q, it's none of your business how other leagues make money!  Actually, it is.  Every time you join the words "roller derby" and something shady like Jell-O wrestling, you're impacting every roller derby league and derby player.  What you do as a derby league has ripples and consequences for all of us.  Derby is finally stepping away from its past as a "spectacle" and moving towards sport, and if your league decides that making money is way more important that dignity, then you are making it tougher for the rest of us to be respectable. Please don't bring the rest of us into the ring.  If you as an individual want to Jell-O wrestle, fine.  Go ahead and do it!  Just don't drag roller derby into it.

If you were offended by this post, please fill out this form or we can have an actual dialog about it.

Clickety click clique! Does your league have destructive cliques?

Roller derby leagues are a just like any group of people on earth; when you get forty plus people together, you're bound to have some people who instantly bond, some people who are casually friends, and a few that aren't going to get along at all.  It's human nature.  We are all united by our love of derby, but sometimes, that's the only connection two people have.

For example, I'm more than a little nerdy.  I know you're all shocked and outraged, but I like nerdy stuff and nerdy people.  I like comic books, steam punk, art, bad horror movies, and really violent music.  If you're amenable to that stuff, we'll probably hang out, outside of derby.  If you're interested in karaoke, college basketball, shoe shopping and listening to country western music, we're probably not going to be that close, and that's ok!  Just because we are in the same league, we don't have to be bestest buddies!  We just have to be kind to each other and have each other's backs.

Unfortunately, sometimes people take these friend attractions too seriously and start excluding other people in their league.  Allstars exclude B teamers, B-teamers exclude newbies, newbies cling together for support and get defensive, the cool kids exclude everyone else, the  the refs...well, refs are a different animal all together. As cliques develop in a league, they can turn cancerous and start affecting the health of your league.  Let your friendly groups turn into tumorous cliques, and you've got the perfect breeding ground for a mean girl, and ain't nobody got time for that!

So, what if you have one of these bullying cliques in your league?  How do you cope as an individual?

How do you deal with a vicious clique in your league?

1.  Don't try and impress them.   Cliques want you to want to be their friends. No matter how much you think it will help, don't try and impress them.  It's just better to avoid them and ignore them.  I know that's easier than it sounds, but if you try and impress them, they'll just feel more powerful and things will never change.

2.  Don't let your self esteem be reliant on other people.  Easier said than done, but if you are always looking to other people to define your self worth, you are always going to be easy pickings for a clique.

3.  Don't give them too much energy.  Be nice, be friendly, but be distant.  Cliques have an aura of drama around them at all times, and you don't need to get sucked in, even by accident.  Avoid the drama, concentrate on yourself and life in your league will get better and better. 

So, what can you do if you suspect your circle of friends is becoming a pus-spewing goiter of exclusivity?  You can ask yourself these questions, and answer honestly. After that, the next move is yours.

Are you a part of a clique?

Last time I used the Heathers.  This time I'm trying to appease the younger generation

1.  Do you deliberately exclude people from activities?  I'm not talking about an occasional night out once in a while, but do you exclude people on a regular basis and then make a point to mention the exclusion in front of people who are not in your group?  If you do, your group of friends may not just be a group, but a nasty little clique.

2.  Are you and your group of friends creating a pecking order in your league?  So, are you?  If so...guess what...click click clique!

3.  Does your group of friends intimidate other skaters?  Let me ask that one again, do you intimidate other skaters?  Are they afraid to approach your group?  Do you like the fact that they kowtow to your group? 

4.  Is one of the favorite activities your group of friends has is making fun of other skaters?  That's not a good thing, people.

If you think you're in a clique, it's up to you to figure out how things got the way they did, and it's up to you to figure out how to make things better.  Are you going to remain an exclusive group of douchebags, or are you going to evolve into human beings and teammates?  I hope if you're reading this blog, you will be one of those who will step up and stop walking down the path of a mean girl.   Yeah, I said it.  You're on the way to becoming a mean girl if you stay in your bitchy clique.  Trust me when I tell you this, mean girls never prosper. 

Are You a Shark, a Dolphin or a Jellyfish?

Skaters are varied and special and individual snowflakes of precious individuality.  Aw.  Anyway, in the soupy sea of derby, we only fall into three classifications when it comes to our development and our study of our sport. Wait, what?  We're supposed to study our sport?  That depends.  How hungry are you?  Are you a shark, dolphin or jellyfish when it comes to your derby appetite?

Sharks never ever stop swimming; if they do, they don't get the oxygen they need from the water.  I'm a shark skater.  I go to extra training when I can, visit other league practices, volunteer to go to newbie practices, study reffing...anything to improve my skating!  Shark skaters watch endless footage, and talk way too much derby.  Is there an opportunity for cross-training out there?  If so, I'll be there with bells on, if that's what I need to wear.  Sharks are often very hard on themselves and fear that if they don't keep learning, keep honing their skills, then they will lose ground.  Shark skaters are probably super annoying to other classifications of skaters; I've been told by a couple of people that my schedule would overwhelm them.  To be fair, it hard to stay in the shark mode your entire derby career; even the best of us needs to power down from shark mode for a while and try the dolphin life at times.

Hey, you guys having an open practice I can crash?  Image found here

Some skaters love playing the game, but don't have the same kind of singular devotion a shark has.  These skaters are dolphins; they play hard, but they only stick around to play derby when it's fun for them.  If someone sends them footage to watch, they MIGHT get around to it, but only if they have the time.  Extra training sessions?  Maybe, if they don't have something else to do that day.  Is it close by?  If it's close by, they'll probably be there....maybe.   Dolphin skaters don't want derby to be more than a dangerous hobby, and that's ok.  The derby habitat has plenty of room for sharks and dolphins to coexist.  I believe most derby players tend to change from dolphins to sharks and back again over their careers.  You give what you can to this sport and real life always should come first.

How many of you have swum in the ocean, only to get out because the water was infested with jellyfish?  Go home jellyfish, nobody likes you.  Jellyfish just sort of float around on the track and only digest what happens to accidentally float into their orifices?  Do jellyfish have orifices?  Jellyfish do nothing to get better in derby; they don't embrace new strategies, or bother to learn them.  Sometimes they show up for practices, if the tide brings them that way, but for the most part, they just ruin everyone's day by just flopping around on the track.  It's time to EVOLVE, jellyfish and turn into something interesting that gives back to your team and league.  For the life of me, I will never understand why anyone joins derby to just sort of skate in circles, but to each her own. If you're reading this, please don't be a jellyfish!  Spines are a good thing!

The Case Against MVP Blocker Awards

Every once in a while, I get a message from another skater and I have to make it a blog topic.   MVP awards are a curious animal in derby; sometimes I wonder if they are worth keeping around, or do they cause more problems than they are worth?  I've received MVP awards, and often wondered why, and have not received an award when I felt I had a stellar game.  MVP awards often seem to be  given as a whim, instead of after sound decision making.  It's definitely food for thought.  Genea contacted me about her thoughts of MVP awards, and with her permission, I posted her letter to my blog.

The Case Against MVP Blocker Awards
by Genea Morfeld Swan   

Genea skates for the Charlotte Roller Girls

I love being recognized. I love when I lay a big hit and an opponent flies in to the stands and the crowd roars. Who doesn’t? But a GREAT blocker works with her teammates. We make impenetrable walls and recycle repeatedly. Like the legs of a giant centipede, we should march and think as one.

Of course, this isn’t always the case. You have the chaser, the gets-knocked-down-easily-goat, you have that fancy skater who has to do the tricky moves that don’t really help block the jammer or clear the line, the swoosh-out-and-lays-a-big-hit-but-then-can’t-recover-quickly-enough-player. The uninformed crowd loves these types. Those of us on her team are thinking: “WHAT are you doing?”

I recently attended a game where the MVP blocker award was mistakenly awarded to a player who had been ejected for insubordination. The team was flustered by having to choose someone directly after the game and, unfortunately, the selection of MVP was actually made by a player who was skating at the time of the ejection and didn’t see it happen. 

So what IS the thought process of the people making these haphazard and potential rash choices for MVP? 

Sometimes I think it’s a person’s boutfit that stood out. Or just one big play. Maybe that person was able to hold a jammer alone in the front in several consecutive jams, ending up out of play but always racing ahead alone anyway.

Do these things make for a good derby player? Are we unintentionally rewarding this behavior by giving an award to the blocker that ‘stood out’ during the game? What about those players who are talking to their teammates and keeping them together? What about the hard worker whose solid game play keeps her teammates on task and aware of each jammers location to move effectively as one and keeping the pack slow so the jammer can’t get an advantage?

And don’t get me started about the jammers with the fancy skating that don’t net the most points.

In summary, MVP awards are awesome for two people.... But I am not sure they are truly representative of game play that should be rewarded.

The skaters we all are....even if we don't want to be.

Nobody is perfect, and we all are annoying at some point in life and in our derby career.  I've been guilty of being "That girl" at practice some times, but for the most part, the following skater-types aren't evil....they're just really really really annoying.

1. The skater who gets distracted by any movement while being explained drills.  I am totally guilty of this.  If our practice gets split up into two drills, and we're having a discussion in ours, if I see movement going on in the other one, I totally focus on that.  I hate that I have to constantly remind myself to stay with what MY coach is saying at the time.  It's hard!  I have the "squirrel" attention span when I put on wheels.  Ugh.

2.  The skater who never has the right wheels for the bout.  This skater never reads the emails the captains send out and is always woefully unprepared for the bouting surface.   I don't mind it if it happens once or twice, but if you make it a habit, you are annoying!  Stop relying on everyone else to have your gear there.

3.  The skater who signs up for any extra thing, and then can never make it.  Is there an invitational in the area?  A pick up practice with a nearby league?   Your team is doing some bonding and playing kick ball?  This skater signs up for all the things but never can make it because she signs up for all the things in her real life too.  This is the skater who is being hung by her own good intentions; try to be realistic when you sign up for extra activities.

4.  The skater that is always late and has to be re-explained everything.  Your team is intently learning a new strategy at the beginning of practice, and after it has been explained and people have grasped it, and then "Lucy I'm Always Late" comes floating in and has to be caught up on the whole new strategy.  I know people can't always be on time for every practice, but habitual tardiness just effs up the whole vibe of practice.  Be on time, tape the track down, and do your team warm ups.  Make it happen, cap'n. 

Go ahead, you know you want to look.

5.  The skater who has problems finding the right sports bra.  There is one skater in every league who seems to have issues finding an appropriate sports bra to wear during practice.  Try as you might, you can't look away from the boobies!  It's just an awkward situation for everyone, except the skater with the brassiere fail.

6.  The new skater who keeps giving everyone advice.  Ah newbies, they're so cute and have all the enthusiasm, but sometimes they cross the line and think they're experts after a month or two of derby. Nothing is more precious, and sweet and annoying than having a newbie try to dish out advice to seasoned skater, committees or coaches.  Shh!

There are many more annoying skaters we all end up being at one point or another, and I'll do part two later this week.  If you have any suggestions, let me know.

Taking Advice as a Veteran from Veterans

About a year ago, I wrote a blog for newbies about how to take advice in derby; often advice is given through clenched teeth and a harsh tone of voice, so it can be a little hard to swallow for newer skaters.  Now, add some experience and a little ego, and it can be that much harder for a veteran skater to take advice from another veteran skater.

There is definitely a pecking order in derby.  It starts with amount of experience, the number of games you've played, how much play time you get in, whether you jam or not, and skating skill.  Derby is competitive; people are not only competing against the other leagues, but for spots on a roster.  If you are in a very talented league, it's quite possible you keep an eye on the other players and step your own skills up to stay one step ahead of the competition.  Unfortunately, this atmosphere can hinder teammate to teammate communication when it comes to feedback; it can engender a lot of "Who the hell does she think she is?" reactions.

Nobody likes to hear that they aren't perfect, especially from a peer, but this is a sport where the number one complaint I hear from skaters is "I don't get enough feedback!"  We all would rather hear the feedback come from captains, coaches and refs, but sometimes you can learn the most from the people who skate right next to you in jam after jam.

HOW TO GAIN THE MOST FROM PEER FEEDBACK

1.  Listen.  What?  Exactly.  Most of us suck at listening to each other; we're in a hurry to get out what we want to say or defend ourselves.  Really listen to what your peer has to say.  You don't have to agree with everything she or he is saying, but the first step is listening.

2. Take it in.  Give the feedback a moment to sink in before you strap on your butthurt panties. Even if you think the person is full of crap, sometimes they have something worth saying and learning from.  I know it's hard when our emotions and adrenaline are running high, but take a moment and really think about what the person is saying to you.

3. Listen to the tone.  Is the person giving you feedback in a bitchy tone?  She's probably just venting, but if her tone isn't hostile, she's probably trying to help you out because you are her teammate.  Even if her tone is slightly hostile, you can still learn from the feedback.  PS anything said in the heat of a jam is probably not feedback.

4.  Consider the source.  Some skaters are quick to point out that you forearmed them in a hit, while they're sticking their elbows up your nose. Some skaters are hypercritical of others, and no matter how you interact with them, they are going to be negative.  On the other hand, there are those skaters who couldn't give good feedback if you paid them money.  Every move you make is "Awesome and amazing" even if you fell and tripped over your own feet on the way to the bathroom. That feedback is useless.

5.  Check your ego.  You aren't Bonnie Thunders, and you ain't perfect.  Get over your ego and maybe you'll learn something.

HOW TO GIVE PEER FEEDBACK WITHOUT BEING A DOUCHE.

1.  Pick your time.  Right after someone kicks your feet out from under you is probably not the best time to offer "feedback".  Face it, you aren't going to be delivering it in any kind of tone or constructive manner if you're pissed off.  Take time to cool down.  Also, judge if they are ready to get feedback.  Right after they have jammed through a power jam may not be the best time to critique their blocking style!

This is probably not the time to offer feedback.  Photo by Joshua R. Craig

2.  Pick your battles.  Is this really important feedback, or are you being a bitch?  It's a fair question.  Is this a pet peeve YOU have or is it something that will dramatically cut down on her penalties or up her game?  Really think about it, because if it is something petty, then just zip your lip and move on.

3.  Consider having a third party deliver it.  This can be tricky, but if you know the person won't be receptive to a peer giving them feedback, then you might want to appeal to a higher power.  Talk to your coaches or captains; put your feedback in their hands, and they can judge if it is worth passing on.  Take yourself out of the equation and let those who get paid the big bucks handle it.  (I kid about the big bucks.)

4.  Let them know you're struggling with the same issues.  It helps to give feedback if you can share the same problem and offer solutions of how you've been dealing with it.  A problem shared is a problem halved!